MilSpouse Friday Fill-in #47

Have you (spouse) ever considered joining the military and what do you think of dual military couples? submitted by Project Army Wife


I have the utmost respect for dual couples - in fact my brother and sister-in-law are a recently retired dual couple, they met in ROTC and amazingly managed to never get stationed apart in 20 years which is quite the feat. I've seen quite closely how difficult it can be just to be a dual serving couple let alone once you bring kids into the mix, it becomes insanely hard. I did NJROTC in high school and had some pressure to apply to the Academy but that was really not the direction I wanted to go. In fact I'd always sworn I'd NEVER even date anyone in the military...obviously that worked out well for me. Ha! I'm quite content to let the hubs serve.


What is your idea of a perfect Sunday afternoon? submitted by A Few of My Favorite Things


Napping on the couch would definitely be involved. I can't seem to nap any other time, I really think Sunday afternoons are made for stretching out on the couch while watching an old movie...and drifting off. 


What do you usually do for the 4th of July holiday? submitted by Anchor’s Away


Usually it involves some sort of explosives/pyrotechnics. I really REALLY like making things go boom. Probably a little more than is healthy. Alas this year it's SO dry here, there are none to be had wah wah wah. So we'll just do the BBQ thing with cold beer and chilled wine. 


If they could make an Olympic event JUST for you that you know you’d medal in, what would it be? submitted by Pants are Confusing


This is *my* question! I know how cool is that?! Even better? I never imagined it'd get picked so I never even thought of what my answer would be. Why yes, I *am* blond! :-) While I think I'd do well in competitive tea brewing, I really think my medal would come in bargain shopping. I'm not a couponer but if there is a bargain to be had, I *will* ferret it out. Either that or rummy. I play for blood hehehe 


What have you been doing to get yourself bathing suit ready for the summer? submitted byNot Just an Army Wife



This is actually a great one for me. While I've always been fairly active, I've really kicked it into high gear. Every morning I walk for about 2 miles and I've recently started running - I'm doing the couch to 5k. Why I decided to start running at the end of JUNE in the middle of TEXAS where it is roughly one BILLION degrees at 7am is beyond me but hey. I'm blond remember. I'm feeling pretty good, sore, but good sore. I don't have a specific goal in mind as far as weight loss goes, I'd just like to be in shape (that's not round). 

MilSpouse Friday Fill-in #46

Are you a different person than you were five years ago? submitted by Sisterly Thoughts


Sure, I'm not all that different but I have grown and evolved. Five years ago I was still a relatively new mom slogging through that and trying to figure out how to, well, BE a mom or a successful one at least. I was also still a rather naive young Navy wife...still living in my hometown (thanks small Navy weather community!) Now it's a bit more old hat both motherhood and the military deal. Under it all, I'm still me. 

If you could go on Amazing Race, who would you take with you as your partner and why? submitted by Thoughts from a Poekitten



This is actually something we've talked about! we're avid fans of Amazing Race along with my sister - when we were all living in the same town, we'd have along with a few other friends, watching parties. Yes we are those people. My sister and I have actually talked quite extensively about submitting an audition tape. We work amazingly well together and both of us have traveled quite a bit. We'd be screwed for anything that involved skydiving but other than that I know we'd do fantastic! The hubs and I would probably kill each other lol but really my practical soul says one of us needs to stay home and watch the kids. 


Does Facebook or Twitter actually bring more stress or good in to your life? submitted by Just an Arizona Girl


Definitely more good however I use them differently. Twitter is more anonymous and more of my "let it out" place whereas Facebook is populated with my mom, siblings, pastor, assorted family members etc. It's wonderful for keeping everyone updated on the boys and just keeping in touch but I'm definitely more guarded and watch my opinions more on there. 


June is National Soul Food Month- what’s your soul food? submitted by NH Girl Displaced


Lefse. It's like a Norwegian tortilla but made of potatoes. My grandmother made it growing up and she's been gone for more than 15 years...the last few years my sister and I have started making it. It's like childhood in my mouth. It's my favorite food. Ever. 


If you could live in any other era than the current, which one would it be & why? submitted by Sugar in My Grits


I'm a history buff and while there are quite a few eras that fascinate me and I'd love to visit, I'm not sure that I'd love to live full time in any of them. I kind of love my modern conveniences a little too much lol. The 1850's of California have fascinated me, Victorian England, 1700's Scotland, 1940/50s Cornwall, really I could go on...and on. But I think I'll stick with where I'm at and be content with reading about my favorite eras. 

I hate you commissary bagger

While my sister was here we made a trip to the commissary. Not a big deal, she's not a normal house guest after all (she even lived with us for around a year when biggish first born) and really part of the fun of her visits is that they're really quite low key. We do some geocaching, goofing off, Scrabble playing, that's about it. But I digress...so we went to the commissary. Not exciting. What was exciting in my small world was having someone help wrangle my two small people. Which is when I got annoyed. Nay upset. No, that's not right either. Nope. That's when I got so mad that I seethed and then cried later. I very very rarely cry. I'm just not a crier but damn it all, it was rude and it HURT. 

If you've never been to a commissary then you may not know that there are baggers who work for tips only. They're frequently older Asian women at least in my experience they are. I usually don't have cash (damn this cashless society!) so I usually either take out my own or just use the self check out as to avoid the baggers however this day I used a bagger. I wish I had not and I probably will not any time in the near future. Yes it made me that mad. So we check out and all that jazz, the smalls are attached to auntie and are walking slower and showing her all kinds of things that are interesting to 3 and 6 year olds everywhere. I'm walking with the bagger and she asks me if the that was my nanny. I'm slightly befuddled as my sister and I look pretty darn similar - she's quite a bit taller (haha close to 6 inches, yes that was the bane of my existence growing up since she's younger) and I'm curvier. That's when the bagger said "huh well cause she so tall and skinny and you so fat." 

ARE YOU FOR REAL?!

Did you just call me fat? You work for tips and you just flat out called me fat? I started shaking I was so upset. 

Yes I know I'm not the skinniest girl in the world (and for the record my sister is a runner and is in amazing shape but she's not even remotely close to stick thin either!!). I have CURVES! I'm 5' 6" and I am a story of averages, seriously. I am the average height of a woman, I am the average size of a woman. I wear a size 14. I've birthed and nursed two babies...and those puppies never shrank so yeah I'm a bit top heavy too.  I work out EVERY single day - we walk at least 2 miles a day every day. That hurt, weight is something that has always been a struggle for me. I've been dieting for basically 15 years...I don't eat crazy amounts of crap...although sometimes I want to and just give up and give into it but damnit I DON'T.

I reported her to management and didn't see her when I ran in yesterday. I don't want her to get fired but seriously hope that there were repercussions because I was in shock at the insane inappropriateness of her comments. 

But I think it's going to be a very long time before I use a bagger again....

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In #39

Giving it another whirl! 

Have you and your spouse agreed to live in separate locations (a geographical bachelor tour) knowing that the short-term inconvenience would have long-term benefits for your family? How did it work for you? submitted by When Good People Get Together

Not yet but we've discussed it. Right now our kids are young and I'm homeschooling the oldest so we're pretty travel ready. It'd really depend on the situation. I'm getting ready to start grad school in the next few months so yes, we know it might at some point be beneficial for us to live apart for awhile. I've had several friends who've done the geobatch tour with varying degrees of success. Frankly we spend enough time apart, I'd like to avoid it. 

What is your favorite thing about being a MilSpouse? submitted bySarah Ruth Today


"Just" being proud of him for his service and sacrifice. Moving, while it can be a pain (see our nightmare move haha) can also be a great adventure! 

If you could still have your spouse/significant other and your family, but take the military life out of it…would you?  submitted by Trust. Love. Believe. Bake.


That's a tough one. On one hand yes because I miss having my career and location stability but on the other hand, I've really enjoyed all of our adventures. I could live without deployments of course but it is what it is. Regardless we're now on the downhill slope to retirement so we'll find out in just a few years. 



What have your homecoming experiences been like after a year long tour of separation? submitted by Army Soldier, Army Wife


Thankfully uneventful. Just takes a few days to get used to having him around again. We're pretty low key people and hubs, thankfully, is a pretty calm guy who's been there done that and hasn't had any re-integration problems. 

If you have a child(ren) why you chose their name(s)? If not, why you would name your child something?  submitted by Tiara’s & ACU’s


With our oldest we didn't find out what we were having - I was *throughly* convinced that it was a girl...so much that when he was born and hubs announced that he was indeed a HE, I promptly said "no it's not!" So we had several names picked out - I'd had a lot of complications and conked out from meds soon after he was born. When I woke up, I asked when we were going to fill out the birth certificate only to have the nurse tell me that my husband had done that "hoooooours ago!" I was not amused. It was his first choice name and my 2nd...lucky for the hubs, it fits him PERFECTLY and I could not fathom him having any other name. After that debacle, I had the final choice on baby two haha. His name was just one that I really loved and seems to fit him perfectly. His middle names (yes two) are after my grandpa who passed away while I was pregnant with him and after my dad. I would love to have a little girl because I had a few fantastic girlie baby names but we're done so they'll just have to sit in my memory. 




Mr Linky http://www.blenza.com/linkies/links.php?owner=wifeofasailor&postid=29Apr2011

This is where I will dazzle you with the stupidity of the Army.

Today the hubs called from work...but first you have to understand a little about his work, the unit he's attached to is akin to the asshole of a pig. Except pigs are cute. And smart. Neither are qualities that anyone at his job seems to posses. When he tells people here (or even other Army folk not here) the standard and expected response is  a sympathetic sigh and a "I'm so sorry!" Yes it's *that* fabulous. So anyways, that is the number one reason that we've stopped fighting the orders to Fort Hood...it's an escape.

So anyways he calls with really awesome news. That is if you define awesome as "someone giving you 10,000 paper cuts all over your body then dunking you in lemon juice." Someone, no one is exactly sure who has decided that the hubs is going TDY (temporary duty somewhere that is not here) on January 12th. Ok, fine I say. Until he says "for three weeks." To which I promptly started yelling and eventually crying. Which makes exactly nothing better but still. Why is this so massively stupid? Oh where do I start?

For one the dates that he was given means that he will have exactly THREE DAYS to completely clear the base here AND get his ass to Texas. To put it mildly, it ain't gonna happen. There is no way in this reality or any other that he can clear the base in less than 3 days let alone drive 1500 miles in those same three days. The Army standard is 10 working days to clear a base!

Ok says the husband, I'll just change my date to check in to Fort Hood.

BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Not happening. To add to the fun, if he does NOT check in to Fort Hood on time even if he still hasn't checked OUT of Ft. Stewart, he was be regarded as AWOL. Seriously.

I'm not even putting the boys and I into the equation. I've moved alone before, while it's a huge pain in the ass, I can do it. I haven't done it alone with two kids but I have some awesome friends here so I know that I can get some help at least with someone keeping the midgets while I supervise packing etc. The drive doesn't bother me either. The boys and I drove more than 6,000 miles alone this summer so another 1,500 is nothing.

Right now I'm more pissed off than anything else. I mean, seriously? Are they stupid or are they dumb as a damn rock? Who makes decisions like this? Right now I want to walk in there and yell at someone. Which would not help anything but holy crap would it make me feel better.

The last few days...

It is a well known fact in MilSpouse circles that the last few days of a deployment are not made up of 24 hour days. They are, in fact, approximately 240 hours long...each. Okay, okay, maybe that's an exaggeration but really it's not much of one. As busy as we are with school and sports and the general chaos of two small boys, the days are draaaaaaaggggging. If today were any other, normal day it would be about 8pm with all that I've done already. But noooooo it's instead barely 1:30.

Before the hubs goes anywhere when he'll be gone for more than a few days, I slack off on the house things - I'm not alone. Every spouse I know does too. Not much of a shocker, I mean who really wants to be doing laundry and vacuuming when your loved one is packing to leave for weeks or months at a time. Of course you want to spend every minute just being together. Once he leaves I spend an hour or two or day catatonic on the couch cuddling with my boyos. Then I start cleaning to make up for all that I've ignored and just to be DOING something. Like if I'm busy time will go faster. In the beginning it sort of does.

We're at the very tail end of a year long deployment. Knowing that I'll once again be ignoring all but the basics of housework, I've been cleaning like crazy. Hoping that the time will pass faster. Keeping myself physically occupied. Like its a way to prove "Look I'm ok! Look I didn't sit on my ass for the last 12 months" even though he knows that I didn't. I'm cleaning things that I know for a fact he won't care about or notice, some things that don't necessarily even need to be cleaned but it makes me feel better. It a way of dealing with the homecoming anxiety in a productive way. By this time I should be an expert, I'm one of the older more experienced wives but I don't feel that way. I know what to expect, I know that no matter what there's an adjustment to having him home again, that there are always little conflicts, stresses. Knowing doesn't make any of it easier. If anything its making me clean harder as if to prove just how "ok" I am. Honestly I am ok. It hasn't been an easy year and we've had our share of trauma as well as joy. But it's over...well almost anyways.

Now I think I need to go vacuum my ceiling fans....